I have to admit that recently I’ve been a little bit of a slouch. I was at one time full of energy with a “to do” list a mile long each day. Maybe it is the summer time or perhaps it is because even two mommies are swamped by having nine children at home 24/7, but for whatever the reasons of late, I’ve taken to enjoying a mid day break. Most days I’m judicious with my “spare” time with one or two small exceptions…
There is this mindless reality show on some domestic cable channel called “Clean House.” It promotes a crew of colorful characters that go into someone’s shameful jumble of a house/life and rally them to sort through their mess in exchange for some professional design and organization. The result after a weekend of cleaning, a yard sale, and donation of unnecessary junk is three remodeled rooms that are pristine and inviting.
I’m not really certain of the draw this show has for me, other than I can totally relate to the need for structure and order. That, and the fact that I can understand how one thing can lead to another and before long you realize life circumstances have overwhelmed you and you are mentally mired. It’s hard to move past the condition to which you’ve become accustomed and put forth the colossal effort to move forward with a fresh slate. Our messes comfort us in a weird way.
I got to thinking recently about how difficult it seems to be for myself and for others I know to let go of things that seem to interfere in our ability to move forward in life. Behaviors and attitudes that are inherently adverse to where we want to be long term seem like an illogical choice, but it’s that baggage we carry with us from childhood, from past experiences, or from stubbornness.
I remember a story told to me many years ago that demonstrates this premise:
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Jenny was a bright-eyed, pretty five-year-old girl. One day when she and her mother were checking out at the grocery store, Jenny saw a plastic pearl necklace priced at $2.50. How she wanted that necklace, and when she asked her mother if she would buy it for her, her mother said, “Well, it is a pretty necklace, but it costs an awful lot of money. I’ll tell you what. I’ll buy you the necklace, and when we get home we can make up a list of chores that you can do to pay for the necklace. And don’t forget that for your birthday Grandma just might give you a whole dollar bill, too. Okay?”
Jenny agreed, and her mother bought the pearl necklace for her. Jenny worked on her chores very hard every day, and sure enough, her grandma gave her a brand new dollar bill for her birthday. Soon Jenny had paid off the pearls.
How Jenny loved those pearls. She wore them everywhere-to kindergarten, bed and when she went out with her mother to run errands. The only time she didn’t wear them was in the shower-her mother had told her that they would turn her neck green!
Now Jenny had a very loving daddy. When Jenny went to bed, he would get up from his favorite chair every night and read Jenny her favorite story.
One night when he finished the story, he said, “Jenny, do you love me?”
“Oh yes, Daddy, you know I love you,” the little girl said.
“Well, then, give me your pearls.”
“Oh! Daddy, not my pearls!” Jenny said. “But you can have Rosie, my favorite doll. Remember her? You gave her to me last year for my birthday. And you can have her tea party outfit, too. Okay?”
“Oh no, darling, that’s okay.” Her father brushed her cheek with a kiss. “Good night, little one.”
A week later, her father once again asked Jenny after her story, “Do you love me?”
“Oh yes, Daddy, you know I love you.”
“Well, then, give me your pearls.”
“Oh, Daddy, not my pearls! But you can have Ribbons, my toy horse. Do you remember her? She’s my favorite. Her hair is so soft, and you can play with it and braid it and everything. You can have Ribbons if you want her, Daddy,” the little girl said to her father.
“No, that’s okay,” her father said and brushed her cheek again with a kiss. “God bless you, little one. Sweet dreams.”
Several days later, when Jenny’s father came in to read her a story, Jenny was sitting on her bed and her lip was trembling. “Here, Daddy,” she said, and held out her hand. She opened it and her beloved pearl necklace was inside. She let it slip into her father’s hand.
With one hand her father held the plastic pearls and with the other he pulled out of his pocket a blue velvet box. Inside of the box were real, genuine, beautiful pearls.
He had them all along. He was waiting for Jenny to give up the cheap stuff so he could give her the real thing.
By: Author Unknown
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So it is for us with many things in life. How often do we sacrifice beauty in our lives because we refuse to mature past the cheap trinkets? How often do we hold onto things when we should let go?
I think many times we grasp so firmly to unhealthy patterns, relationships, habits, or activities because it seems impossible to let go. Or perhaps we just feel like a second rate something is better than an unlikely nothing. We are so focused on our rights, or our possessions, or what we deserve in life, that we overlook the abundance that comes from a clutter free existence.
I know more than anyone how hard it is to let go of the familiar for the possibility of something better. But if we analyze our heart and mind, there is always a measure of clearing and cleaning that needs to be done. Sometimes, it is so hard to see what awaits us, but I firmly believe when we learn to let go, there is something much better waiting to bless us.
~the laundry goddess, June 24, 2008
“Man cannot discover new oceans until he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” ~ Andre Gide
