Temptress's Version How did two fairly straight laced, heterosexual, long married couples end up in the world of poly amory ??? Well, I will echo what Goddess has said. We did NOT go looking this, it found us. In the truest and most simple explanation……. Poly love found us. In tracing the roots of this blending, it is very obvious that Goddess and I are the key players… we led, the hubbies followed. While Goddess and Mr. Big had a long courtship and engagement consisting of several years and a fairy tale wedding with all the trimmings. Fix and I met and eloped in a small civil service within 25 days of meeting over the phone. While vastly different our marriages had 1 thing in common. Both were doomed to divorce by family and friends. And 16 + years and 5 children each later, we have proven all of the naysayer's wrong. Each couple has had it’s ups and downs, joys and sorrows. Thru it all, each marriage remained committed and loving. We learned to bend with the winds when they got rough. When Goddess and I were both in our early weeks of pregnancy with babies number 4 we met online and became fast friends. We hooked up thru a group of ladies who we are still affiliated with today. But from the very beginning, there was something special about Goddess…. I could never put my finger on it She and Mr. Big came to our state for a business conference when the babies were about 9 months old….. I was instantly drawn to them both… and tried real hard to ignore Mr. Big while there. A married woman shouldn’t have those thoughts about another man. Especially her friends’ husband. Several years later a family vacation took us thru their state, we met for dinner and stayed the weekend. Again an odd chemistry and attraction to both that I couldn’t explain. To top that…. Fix even felt it where Goddess was concerned and we had many discussions about it and after a time it became almost a joke. He would laughingly say… “ if anything ever happens to you… Mr. Big better look out…. Goddess is mine” Flash forward to the fall of 2004. I had just given birth to baby #5. And after a summer of a lot of soul searching and rethinking my belief system, getting in touch with what I believed versus what I was taught to believe…. My mind was in a state of openness about many things , but admittedly… poly was not one of them. I was very familiar with the lifestyle because a friend had been openly poly for awhile. I felt it would never be something for me as the thought of another woman with my husband made me ill. And another man touching me made me more ill.(what is the saying… never say never.. LOL ) . During this same period of time, events had taken place with Mr. Big and Goddess to open their minds as well. ( Not my story to tell). Because of these events, communication with Goddess had picked up a bit, we were talking more one on one, via email and phone.. and one day as I was going thru some photos on my computer I fell across one of Goddess that I had seen many times before… but for some reason it took my breath away this time. I sat and stared at the picture and looked deep into her eyes and realized I loved her. It was very disconcerting to realize that I didn’t love her as my Best friend any longer. I loved her as one would love a spouse. It shook me and as I let my thoughts go and explore the feelings I told myself I was reaching into a place that I could not go. And so I did what was only right…. I thought….. I began to pull away from Goddess. I loved her. I adored her… and my heart ached that I could never tell her what she had come to mean to me over the years. That our friendship had turned from something simple and enjoyable to something very complex and unheard of for the two of us. I used my new baby and many activites as an excuse for my busy life and why I become less available to the friendship. Each passing day, week ,month became a test of my will to keep her at arms length. Each phone call torture, each email brought a longing. But there was a small glimmer….. a teeny little spark of hope that kept me holding on. During these months Goddess and Mr. Big were evolving. Because of the events of the previous fall they were starting to look into may alternatives…. One being the poly lifestyle…. Not necessarily for them…. But they were looking at many different types of “openness”. I held onto that a lifeline. And then one day it happened…. She had a dream about my hubby and it caused her a touch of guilt. She told me about it and we talked about it and I realized that I was not struck by the stomach rolling nausea I usually felt when the idea of another woman with my husband was let into my brain. I grabbed a hold of that line she had thrown out and let her think she was reeling me in. Finally that spark of hope had burst into a full fledged flame. I gathered my courage and told her all I had held back for almost a year. Then I held my breath. She was either going to accept it and forward we go ( although where I had no idea) or it would freak her out and I would lose her completely. It is rather obvious which path she chose :D Next we had to break it to the hubbies….. mine took it very well…. As did Mr. Big. As I had said ,Fix already had a bit of a fascination with Goddess. The one hitch was Mr. Big and I. Fix doubted I could be with Mr. Big…. I told myself I could for two reasons…. One I could “sleep” with a friend…. And 2 in order have a relationship with Goddess…. They were a package deal. Mr. Big…. felt that a relationship with me was needed on a more than “ friends who slept together” basis…. So he began a courtship. He called…. He wrote… he IM’d….. And he won my heart in VERY short So there we were…. Two couples, living several states apart with 10 kids between them, who started out as friends and now had very strong feelings for each other. Now what ?? Well…. You meet in a beautiful romantic setting for 3 days together to see “ if this will really work”….. then Fix I go home…. Pack our crew and move to the same town as Mr. Big and Goddess in the space of 60 days. And as soon as we get the new house unpacked…. Realize 7 miles is too far apart….. the kids love being together and we hate being apart…. So we liquidate our home and move in with Goddess and Mr. Big. Now just 4 short months after the blending…….. we take one day at a time. And wake up feeling the greatest joy and happiness possible. We didn’t go looking for this………. Love found us.
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